Thursday, February 28, 2013

The Ageless Erotica Revolution by Donna George Storey

Behind every story, there's a story (and, in this case, a "Storey.") Donna George Storey, who wrote “Invitation to Lunch” for Ageless Erotica, shares what it meant to her to contribute to Ageless Erotica, and her insights about the importance of this anthology.-- Joan

The Ageless Erotica Revolution
Guest blog post by  Donna George Storey

 I’ve been publishing erotic fiction for over 15 years, but “Invitation to Lunch,” my maiden erotic memoir that appears in Ageless Erotica, is one is one of the most satisfying pieces I’ve ever written.

Why? Because it has given me the chance to tell the truth about enjoyable sex between two 50-something people who’ve been married for 27 years.

 On the face of it, what’s the big deal? All memoirs describe real experiences. Yet a careful look at the portrayal of sexuality in our culture shows that positive descriptions of mature sexuality are extremely rare. I’ve been hesitant to try it myself. Without question, Ageless Erotica will help redress that lack.

However, I believe the impact of this book is even more revolutionary. By busting apart the myths about sexuality for older people, we question the stereotypes that hinder us at every age. Writing erotica is all about steamy images and sensibilities, so I consider it a professional duty to pay attention to the media’s presentation of sex. I see three major “acceptable,” but limiting, ways to discuss sexuality today.
  1. The most ubiquitous: idealized visual images of gorgeous models and actors in advertisements, Hollywood movies and pornography. These images are invariably tied to consumption of some sort—buy this product and be satisfied like these demi-gods, if only for the moment. How many 20-year-olds can claim to experience the air-brushed, contrived, and absurdly short encounters so familiar in the visual media? Even in my supposed nubile prime, I felt compelled to compare myself to Hollywood perfection and came up lacking.

  2. The “scientific” journalistic report, which tends to focus on social and physical problems, neuroses and diseases. The focus here tends to be on promiscuity in the young and sexual boredom or dysfunction for older married couples.While we’re all curious about the latest sex survey or specialist’s view of “normal” sexuality, quantitative and expert measures can never capture the complexity of our unique personal experience. 

  3. Erotica and erotic romance, an extremely popular genre. Yet the majority of these stories are fantasies, standing in stark contrast to what we do in our ordinary lives. While there are hardly any positive images of older people enjoying erotic pleasure in this mix, the sad truth is that there are few positive, realistic images for anyone of any age.  Erotic stories can be arousing, but there are limitations to consuming someone else’s ideas of what is sexy. Aren’t the most powerful sexual experiences fearlessly created from the heat of our own passion and imagination? 

Every time someone has the courage to reveal her genuine experience of sexuality in a way that breaks out of safe cliché, she opens the door for others to speak out and look within to define their own truths. There’s potential for release from all kinds of damaging assumptions about what sex is for real people.

If you don’t have to look like Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt to have a great sex life, what other lies are restricting us from owning our potential? Do married couples have to grow bored with each other? Must sexy feelings fade after menopause? Is passionate love beyond our reach after 30? Is dewy innocence really sexier than knowing who you are and exactly what you want in bed? Indeed, since we all hope to live long, rewarding lives, what could be more encouraging than reassurance from wise, experienced lovers that great pleasure lies ahead for as long as we desire it?

In “Invitation to Lunch,” the couple—my husband and I—play out the woman’s fantasy of being watched while they make love. It’s probably no surprise that an erotic writer is attracted to the forbidden fantasies of her sexuality being seen and accepted by others. I realize now that this is what Ageless Erotica means to me: seeing and celebrating the honest erotic experiences of all lovers whatever their age, appearance or sexual preference. Let the new sexual revolution begin!

Donna's Picture.Donna George Storey is the author of Amorous Woman, a semi-autobiographical tale of an American woman’s love affair with Japan. Her fiction and essays have appeared in numerous places including Fourth Genre, The Gettysburg Review, Prairie Schooner, Penthouse, Best American Erotica, and The Mammoth Book of Best New Erotica.  Read more at Her story in Ageless Erotica, "By Invitation Only," is based on a recent lunchtime interlude with her husband of 25 years. Their motto is "you never stop learning" -- especially when it comes to pleasure.

Monday, February 25, 2013

60+ and Wild? Steve Harvey Show wants your story!

The Steve Harvey Show contacted me for help with this casting call. If you fit what they're looking for, please respond directly to Lande Yoosuf, contact info below. I'd love it if you'd also post a comment here -- this could become an interesting discussion! -- Joan


Do you have an active and sexy lifestyle? Do you have adult children who are constantly nagging you because they see you as wild, and wish you would “act your age”? Do you believe that you ARE acting your age: having fun, expressing yourself fully and shamelessly, enjoying an ageless adventure?

Your lifestyle doesn’t have to be kinky -- though it may be, as long as it’s SFDTV (“safe for daytime television”) -- but your kids find your activities embarrassing. You can be married or single, and you’re open about your sexuality and sense of adventure.

Contact Lande Yoosuf to share your story! Please respond with this info:
  • - Full Name 
  • - Age 
  • - Location 
  • - Phone Number 
  • - E-mail 
  • - Professional Title / Occupation 
  • - 3 or more photos and at least one full length photo 
  • - An explanation of your story 

Lande Yoosuf
Associate Producer
The Steve Harvey Show

Monday, February 11, 2013

Ageless Erotica!

Ageless Erotica is now available! Follow this link to buy it at a very good price from Amazon. (Please post a reader comment on Amazon after you've read it, ok?) I have copies for sale now, too, and I'll be happy to sign them - click button at the bottom of this page .

Your independent bookstore should have their copies soon -- request it and they'll notify you. The book will also be available in e-book format very soon.


Ageless Erotica

Edited by Joan Price
Seal Press, 2013

What would it look like if talented writers over age fifty wrote erotica featuring steamy, sexy characters who were also over fifty? Now we know. Ageless Erotica is a ground-breaking anthology of erotic short stories and memoir essays presenting women and men, couples and singles, straight and gay, who are over fifty, sixty, seventy, and beyond – all enjoying and sharing their erotic moments.

This is not your usual erotica with a few wrinkles slapped on -- these are stories that show how hot sex can be at our age. This collection embraces the agelessness of sexuality while still realistically acknowledging the changes that accompany aging.

Ageless Erotica is a stimulating celebration of the many pleasures of "well-seasoned" sex. In this anthology, age is accepted, celebrated, and sensually enjoyed. Some selections are tender and loving, while others are edgy and kinky. Characters may be having spicy sex with partners they have loved for decades; or with new loves, old loves reunited, or forbidden partners; or solo with fantasies. Ageless Erotica has it all, portraying older-age sexuality as healthy, lusty, and glorious.

TO BED by Erobintica
DOLORES PARK by Dale Chase
INVITATION TO LUNCH by Donna George Storey
LADY BELLA by I.G. Frederick
HAND JOBS by Kate Dominic
TONY TEMPO by Tsaurah Litzky
MY NEW VAGINA by Audrienne Roberts Womack
TRAIN RIDE by Harris Tweed
PEAS IN A POD by Maryn Blackburn
THE HOTEL LOUNGE by Skyler Karadan
GEORGE by Lorna Lee
IN THE MEANTIME by Miriam Kura
BY THE BOOK by Rae Padilla Francoeur
BLIND, NOT DEAD by Johnny Dragona
AFTER DINNER EUPHORIA by Peter Baltensperger
MORNING by Belle Burroughs Shepherd 

Media, book reviewers, bloggers:  If you'd like to review Ageless Erotica or interview Joan Price, please email Joan.

To purchase your autographed copy of Ageless Erotica directly from Joan Price via PayPal for $16 plus shipping, please click below.

Autograph to... (name)?

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Valentine's Day 2013

(Robert can't stop laughing after pulling my hat down)
 For Valentine's Day this year (2013), I'm re-publishing the post I wrote in 2011, updating it slightly.

I always loved Valentine's Day with Robert. We bought each other gifts, professed our love for each other emphatically and often poetically. We spent the afternoon making love, glorying in the magic of  the powerful passion we felt for each other. We would love each other for hours -- a candle lighted even in the bright light of afternoon, the bedroom door closed though we were alone in the house. I can still feel the touch of his skin, the sweet pressure of his lips. I hear the love words he muttered.

Dancing was always a part of our self-expression and love expression. One of "our songs" was Anne Murray's "Could I Have This Dance?"

Could I have this dance
for the rest of my life?
Would you be my partner
Every night?
When we're together,
It feels so right.
Could I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

Every Valentine's Day and birthday -- and sometimes New Year's Eve, too! -- he danced for me:  a special dance he had created just to please and entice me. He practiced for days in private, choosing the music,  the choreography, and the costume that he would shed slowly and sensuously as part of his dance.

2013: This is my fifth Valentine's Day without Robert. It wasn't until the third one that I was able to remember his special dances without crying. What beautiful gifts he gave me throughout our seven years together.  What beautiful gifts he gives me still, as I remember him.

For all of you who have a special loved one on this Valentine's Day, glory in what you share. Never take for granted that "the rest of my life" means anything more than "this moment right now."

For all of us who are unpartnered on this Valentine's Day, let's glory in the love we know how to give, and let's give it to ourselves and the people in our lives today. Let's do something special that nurtures us and delights us. Let's make someone else feel special. Let's celebrate our capacity to feel joy. The more love we give, the more we have within us.

On this 2013 update, a good friend is just home from the hospital after suffering a heart attack. "I died three times," he told me -- that's how often they had to re-start his heart. We need to make a special point always of letting the people we love know that we love them. We never know how much time we have.

Whether or not you have a lover right now, you do have people in your life who make your life better just by being in it. On Valentine's Day or any day, tell them how you feel.

Wednesday, February 06, 2013

Hello Touch: Finger Vibrator from JimmyJane

Do you remember the Yellow Pages ad that went, "Let your fingers do the walking"? Hello Touch from JimmyJane is the modern version. Now when your fingers "do the walking," they vibrate the path they take.

Good Vibrations was good enough to send me a sample to review.

Two itty bitty vibrators on stretchy bands fit on your fingers (index and middle, or thumb and index, or however you want). My fingers are small, and the bands fit relatively snugly, which was good for me, but if you have thicker fingers, the bands might be uncomfortably tight.

They're connected by a thin cord to a power pack on your arm. It takes two AAAA batteries, included. Press the bottom button and your fingertips vibrate; press the top button and they stop. I have no idea why the sleeve is marked with a middle button -- there is no middle button.  I had trouble working the buttons until I realized it takes a firm press of the finger in just the right spot, which isn't always obvious.

The Hello Touch is designed to stimulate clitoris, penis, nipples, G-spot -- almost anywhere you want. It isn't advisable to use it anally -- although the bands are tight, you don't want to risk one sliding off the finger during anal use.

JimmyJane was smart about the instruction booklet. I'm used to getting booklets with page after page of tiny print in a dozen languages. This instruction booklet just has illustrations of how to put the thing together and use it, and they're very clear. It also comes with a fabric travel bag.

It is a strange contraption indeed. I think you'll have to get some nervous laughter out of the way before you try it -- at least, I did. It's very unsexy in appearance.

Who cares what it looks like if it works? The problem is that it doesn't work for me. Not at all.

Oh, it vibrates, but the buzzy vibration is very light, nowhere near what this woman needs. Plus it doesn't even feel good to me -- it's too easy to pinch the skin or irritate tender tissues with the cord or bands. I would love to know if any of you succeeded in joyful G-spot stimulation with this -- I tried and failed.

Was my reaction unusual?  I decided to read a few reviews. This will doubtlessly change as more sex toy reviewers get hold of it, but now as I write this, the reviews are on tech gadget sites, and none of the writers actually used the product -- they're just quoting from the PR and ruminating about it.

I'm not a snarky reviewer who pans a product entirely if it doesn't work for me. Maybe it's just me. It probably would be more fun during partner play than solo. And it could work for either clitoral stimulation during intercourse or solo, if you need just light vibration to get you over the edge instead of the turbo power I need.

Some toys work fabulously and become favorites; others are okay but not special. But some -- like this one -- are just interesting experiments to try once and put away.

I'd love to know how you like Hello Touch for solo or partner sex. Please comment!

Thank you, Good Vibrations, for sending it to me for review, and for always appreciating an honest review.

Friday, February 01, 2013

We-Vibe Thrill

Hurray, Good Vibrations sent me the We-Vibe Thrill in time for a pre-Valentine's Day date with myself. This is a dual-action vibrator, which means it stimulates the G-spot internally and the clitoris externally simultaneously. Insert the bulbous part vaginally, position it to your liking with the silver part pressed to your clitoris, and you'll feel its rumbly vibrations in both places.

I like that the fit is adjustable -- the middle part bends easily to conform to your shape. So many rabbit-style vibrators that intend dual stimulation don't fit right - but the bendy midsection makes this one easy to fit. That said, we're all different, and no one shape works for everyone.

The Thrill is completely waterproof (as long as it's not connected to the charger, of course), and I enjoyed wearing it in the shower before settling down to earnest solo play!

Some reviewers report that the handle opening is useless because their fingers don't fit through it. I have tiny hands and could insert a thumb or finger to the first knuckle, which is all that's needed.

But you don't even need to hold it that way -- just hold the top of the handle to guide the Thrill into place, and it stays there -- hands-free! This is terrific for those of us who have arthritis, carpal tunnel syndrome, or any other reason that gripping a vibrating object is uncomfortable or impossible. It's also cool for reading erotica or using your hands on a partner while you vibrate!

 The Thrill will appeal to many older women because the thickest part of the insertable section -- the "bulb" -- is only 1-1/4" inches wide and tapered for insertion, and the part that rests in the vaginal opening is extremely slim. Many women won't need that degree of slimness, but for those who do, it's ideal.

The controls are easy to find (end of the outside end) and use: just press to start, press to change intensity or pattern, press and hold to turn off. Unlike many vibrators, the controls are out of the way while you use it -- you won't accidentally turn it off.

Here's what I don't like: it's not strong enough for me, even on the highest setting. For some reason, the insertable part seems a bit stronger than the external, clitoral part, which makes no sense to me. I know I can't expect  Hitachi Magic Wand power, but this was just too subtle. Other reviewers point out that it works well by rocking it, rocking on it, or even sitting on it -- but though it feels nice internally, there isn't enough clitoral stimulation for this old gal.

If you don't need the intensity that I do, it could be just right for you, though. The multi-speed motor offers eight different modes and intensities. I have simple tastes -- I go straight to the strongest, steady vibration. It also does va-va-voom and cha cha patterns if you prefer.

This clever fellow recharges via USB. Attach the magnetic end to the cord, plug the other end into your computer (or other USB charger, like your phone charger, or power adapter), and voila. Or at least, that's what's supposed to happen. I found that I had  to keep an eye on it during charging because the magnetic parts separate too easily. There's no stand -- you have to lay it on its side -- and it's easy for the charger to fall right off. So check it frequently.

This may be minor, but the silicone, as smooth and lovely as it feels, picks up every bit of lint in the room. It washes easily, so just wash it right before each use. Be sure to use only water-based lubricant.

All in all, I think the Thrill would be thrilling for a woman who appreciates the hands-free, ergonomic design and likes a slim, insertable toy with simultaneous -- though moderate -- clitoral stimulation.

We-Vibe 3 Couple's Vibrator - Click to enlargeYou may know the Thrill's older sister -- the We-Vibe 3 couple's vibrator. This popular toy is for use during partner sex, providing both vaginal and clitoral stimulation during intercourse. (One male reviewer reported that this gave him the sensation of having a vibrating lover!)  The Thrill is similar in concept, design, and body-safe materials, but was designed for solo pleasure.

Thank you, Good Vibrations, for sending me the We-Vibe Thrill.