Sunday, June 26, 2011

Mini-Wahl - only one speed: ferocious!

I had a Wahl as my first vibrator in my thirties.  I bought it at Macys in the "personal care" department -- it was a (wink-wink) massager for tight muscles and for giving the face a rosy glow. It did that, all right! I loved it and named it Wally.

Over the decades, I discovered the Hitachi and other wonders of the world, but Wally really taught me about my sexuality in my youth, when sex was easy, available, yet confusing. I was sad to discard my Wahl at about age 50 when all the plastic attachments had cracked and crumbled and it ran dangerously hot.

When EdenFantasys announced the arrival of the new Mini-Wahl, I couldn't wait to see how it had been reinvented! This model is lightweight in ounces but not in vibrational intensity -- it's a strong vibrator!

It comes with a bunch of pop-on massage attachments for scalp and sore muscles (seriously), and although I tried every one for my -- ahem! - purposes, the only one I liked was this maze-like, round shape that targeted the clitoris and sort of radiated out to a larger area. I found all the attachments rather hard, not the soft rubbery feel that might be more appealing.

The Mini-Wahl recharges by plugging it in and sitting it in its base (if you want -- you don't have to use the base) for a while. Then you don't have to deal with wires or batteries. It's quite unattractive, but maybe that's okay, because it looks so much like an ugly old muscle massager that you don't have to hide it.

It's shaped for ease of holding. The neck of the holder looks like it should bend, but it's actually not very flexible. The Mini-Wahl is really noisy, and if you try to make it bend, it gets noisier.

I've tested many vibrators that have multiple speeds and modes and I just turn the thing all the way up, so it didn't bother me that this vibrator has only one speed: ferocious. If you like a more gradual build-up, you might want to use one of your other toys first until you're close to blast-off.

If you've encountered vibrators that are too strong for you, this one probably wouldn't please you. In fact, some women complain that it's too strong and even "numbing." But if you are among those of us who require extra intensity, the strength is a good thing.

I recommend the Mini-Wahl if you want a strong vibrator that you don't have to hide, and especially if you want to massage sore muscles in addition to playing with it sexually.

Compared to other vibrators I've used and love, though--click here for my other reviews (keep scrolling to "older posts" -- I've reviewed dozens of them!) -- it rates maybe 3 stars out of 5. It does the intended job efficiently, but others do the same job while being prettier, quieter, and more comfortable. It's less than half the price of some of my favorites, though, so do consider it if price is a consideration!

Thank you, EdenFantasys, for sending me the Mini-Wahl for review.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Breaking Rules at Our Age

What sexual “rules” have you broken since turning 50, 60, or beyond?

I ask this because I discovered from the interviews and reader stories that you'll read in  Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex, many of us make some pretty drastic changes in our lives after age 50. Maybe we get divorced,  discover love, open up our marriage, take a new lover, experiment with kink or multiple partners or virtual sex -- or some combination of these or other alternatives.

The point is that although society sees us as settled into mid-life or old age, we're far from "settled." I think there's something about emerging from menopause that makes us question where we want to be in our lives. Menopause often feels like an upheaval -- I've described it before as "PMS on steroids" -- where everything seems upside down. We don't want to be responsible for remembering the whole family's appointments, for example, and we might not be overly kind when we tell family members to take care of themselves.

After the upheaval settles, we see our lives differently. We realize that it's now or never: it's up to us to invent -- or reinvent -- what we want the rest of our lives to be, and what we have to do to actively go after our dreams.

At the same time, in our sexual world, the old ways may not work any more. We may need different kinds of arousal or even a different type of relationship or a different partner. Major!

I got so many stories from my Naked at Our Age interviewees about alternative sex practices that this topic became a whole chapter: "Off the Beaten Path: Nontraditional Sex Practices and Relationships." People wrote about swinging, polyamory, BDSM, friends with benefits, older women/younger men (20-30 years difference!), phone sex, and more.

I predicted that younger readers would be shocked at what seniors are doing behind closed doors, and I should have guessed that it would shock our own age group, too. I've heard a couple of criticisms that this chapter and the one titled "Hiring Sensuality" (which I won't tell you about -- you have to read that one for yourself, and no, it's not just men hiring sex!) make it sound like I'm endorsing or even pushing people towards alternative lifestyles.

I'm not pushing anyone into anything. I'm showing senior sex -- behaviors and attitudes -- in all its colors and stripes. Personally, I support adults doing with other consenting adults whatever brings them pleasure, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone -- including the partners of those consenting adults. I have "vanilla" tastes myself, but that's beside the point. The book is only partly about me. It's really about you... and you... and you.

So back to my original question: What sexual “rules” have you broken since turning 50, 60, or beyond?  By rules I mean society's rules, the law, unspoken or spoken rules in a relationship, even your own rules. I'd love to see a dialogue start here. Please comment!

Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex is now available! Order an autographed copy directly from me -- be sure to let me know to whom to autograph it -- by clicking the PayPal button below...

Or order from Amazon here. To order from other retailers, please see

Learn more about Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud About Senior Sex here.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Jimmyjane Form 4: How do I love thee?

I have a new lover. He teased me in the shower, and then I took him to bed with me and had my way with him. His name is Jimmyjane Form 4, but I'll call him Frankie because his full name sounds too formal and boring, and he's anything but boring. He's a luxury vibrator, and I think I'm in love. Thank you, Kama Sutra Closet, for introducing us!

What do I love about Frankie? His vibrations are strong, and just the type I like: throbbing and rumbly  rather than buzzy. The shape, which looks rather odd, is a lovely fit lengthwise against the whole vulva, with the business end (the smaller end which houses the motor) covering the clitoris and the rest of the vibrator pressed down for extra stimulation. At least that's my favorite way to use it.

If you prefer, the smaller end can be inserted to stimulate the G-spot. I'm enjoying Frankie so much externally that I haven't wanted to switch. It's about 1.5" diameter at the bulby part of the smaller end, then tapers in, then expands again to a 2" diameter at the biggest part, which I can't imagine inserting. 

I love the velvety silicone -- a matte finish that is smooth but with a little drag for friction. Use lube, of course -- non-silicone is best for use with silicone toys. It has a little flexibility, making it easy to position and not have to crook an arthritic wrist uncomfortably.

It charges by sitting in its charging seat. Once charged, it's cord-free and battery-free. It's completely waterproof -- not just splash-proof, but immersible. Hence my shower foreplay.

I have to chide Jimmyjane for making the controls impossible to read unless you're wearing reading glasses and standing in bright sunlight. Fortunately, once you've learned where the three controls are and what they do ("+" for more intense; "-" for less intense; a wavy squiggle for changing function), you can do it by feel.

Be careful that the side with the controls is facing away from your body, or you might accidentally press a button with your thumb that changes the action at the wrong moment, and that's a sad event indeed. 

Shouldn't a luxury vibrator come with its own lint-free storage pouch? I think so. But Frankie arrived in a plastic case that clearly was meant for recycling, not for storage.

Never mind the case and the buttons -- Frankie is a dream lover of a vibrator.

Thank you, Kama Sutra Closet, for bringing us together. Right now Kama Sutra Closet is offering the Jimmyjane Form 4 for $116 (regular price $145!). Put in the code Better15 for a 15% discount on any other, regularly priced item.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Sugar in My Bowl: Real Women Write About Real Sex: book review

Oh, my goodness – I started reading Sugar in My Bowl and I couldn’t stop. I loved this book.

Sugar in My Bowl: : Real Women Write About Real Sex, edited by. Erica Jong, is a remarkable anthology of personal essays and a few short stories, all with the theme of what women think about sex and how they remember and think back on pivotal sexual experiences.

As older women, we’re often ignored and made to feel invisible, especially our sexuality. I love it when books celebrate us, take us seriously, and convey our true experiences and attitudes.

That's what happens in this anthology. At least half of the writers are age 50+. You can tell from some of the photos and dates or era references in their essays. Some of the younger writers talk about their parents, so we get plenty of sex after midlife in this book.

In "Peekaboo I See You," Anne Roiphe describes playing doctor with a pal at age 5, while World War II was part of the adult world. "Jimmy puts his hand on my wee wee and he leans down to examine it carefully." Later they reverse roles, and she wonders, "What do you do with those things below your penis?" "Nothing, he says, "they're just there for decoration." Of course they get caught. We always got caught.

In "Worst Sex," Gail Collins, who came of age in the early 1960s, writes about her religious upbringing, when even starting to get aroused was a sin: "My friends and I were part of the last batch of American women to spend their adolescence being constantly lectured about sex by women who had never had any."

In "My Best Friend's Boyfriend," Fay Weldon describes losing her virginity at age 18 in 1949, when "sex was a dangerous thing, far more interesting and erotic than it is now."

In "Sex with a Stranger," Susan Cheever heard the same warnings as I did growing up in the 1950s: "They won't buy the cow if they get the milk for free." That didn't stop her from picking up men at parties. "The real danger of a one-night stand [isn't that] it will lead to nothing, but that it will lead to everything...Those who are not ready to have their life changed should probably abstain."

In "Going All the Way," Liz Smith writes about losing her virginity to her first cousin at 16 in 1939 in an "A plus" experience. "I don't remember if I had an orgasm," she writes, "I was so ecstatically having 'something' special happen that I didn't know if I was missing something else."

In "Herman and Margot," a short story about an 87-year-old woman and a 92-year-old man, Karen Abbott writes, "In the beginning they take things slowly, reveling in the irony of teasing time when they have so little of it left."

Sometimes the sex is good, often it's unsatisfying, bewildering, even "labia-shrivelling" (Jann Turner). It's always fascinating, the kinds of conversations we wish we could have with other women, but brilliantly written by top-notch writers.

Erica Jong
I kept noticing that the older women's essays had the coloring of decades-later perspective, and this was often the take-home message of the essay. We women not only enjoy having sex -- we also contemplate it afterwards as well as before! Even when the experience is less than fulfilling -- and many of them are! -- we learn from them and struggle to make better choices next time.

Jong writes that Anais Nin told her in 1971, "Women who write about sex are never taken seriously as writers."

"But that's why we must do it, Miss Nin," Jong countered. I agree!

Thank you, Erica Jong and all the writers in this anthology for taking on this mission with such purpose and craft. Exceptional book, highly recommended.

Sugar in My Bowl (the title is from a Bessie Smith blues song) has its own website here.

Wednesday, June 08, 2011

Joan Price Talks About Senior Sex: the video

A few minutes ago, I shared the 1-1/2 minute book trailer video for Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex. That was the quickie video.

Want to know more? Below is the 3 minute video, containing some of the same content with more background and context. I discuss some of the myths about senior sex and share why I wrote both Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty and Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex.

As I say in the video, the two books are a team: Better Than I Ever Expected celebrates the joys of senior sex; Naked at Our Age tackles the problems head-on, with advice from the best experts in the field.

Of course, I have a lot more to say about senior sex than I can cover in 3 minutes. If you'd like to bring me to your city to talk out loud about ageless sexuality, see my speech topics and please contact me.

Many thanks to Mitch Rice and Stephen Rice for helping me create this video for you!


View this video in YouTube by clicking here.

Learn more about Joan's books by clicking here.

Naked at Our Age book trailer video

I am happy to share with you my new book trailer for Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex.

I'll have two videos, actually. The video below is the "quickie" version, just a minute and a half long.

Coming soon is the three-minute version, the one with a little more "foreplay" (I know, three minutes isn't enough foreplay at our age, if ever, but please humor me with this analogy). The longer version gives more of the background and context of the book. I'll post that one soon.

Many thanks to Mitch Rice and Stephen Rice
for bringing this vision to life for me!

To watch this video on YouTube, click here.

To learn more about Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex, click here