Saturday, September 22, 2007

Irritated reader: Why no"Sex for One" info here?

Gratitude, a frequent comment contributor, said this in a comment on another post, and it was a valuable wake-up call to me:

I find myself irritated once again at the prejudice of this blog in favor of couples. Versions of this statement, “Sex is two minds, two bodies, and two hearts making love....” have been repeated and implied over and over in the articles here. While this may be true for many or even most people, the message comes across loud and clear: Sex is for couples only.

I have just searched the archives and don’t find one single post on this website dealing specifically with sex for one and how this can be a way of expressing love for yourself.

I'm surprised at myself for this omission, and I'd like to assure Gratitude (and the rest of you) that I'm absolutely in favor of "sex for one," and I've written about solo sex extensively in Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex after Sixty, with chapters on staying sensual and sexy without a partner, choosing and enjoying sex toys, and maintaining vaginal health. I apologize for the absence of this message here so far!

In the next book, in fact, I have stories from a number of women who are enjoying staying sensual and satisfied without a partner and are willing to describe how they stay zesty. (The single men I hear from are not so satisfied with being unpartnered.)

I'll write more about this in a later post -- for now, I hope you'll enjoy Better Than I Ever Expected and continue to comment and email me.

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