Tuesday, March 19, 2019

Joan Price Joins Sex Educator jessica drake in ‘Guide to Wicked Sex: Senior Sex’


FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

  
Joan Price Joins 
Sex Educator jessica drake i
‘Guide to Wicked Sex: Senior Sex’

Sebastopol Resident and Senior Sex Advocate
Shares Her Wellness Message in
New Chapter of Acclaimed Video Series!

 JoanPic.JPG  jessica.png
jdwgts.png
       
SEBASTOPOL, CA (March 19, 2019) – When 57-year-old Joan Price met Sonoma County artist Robert Rice, age 64, she embarked on a love affair that would change her life forever. Writing about their relationship led Price on a path to become an internationally known senior sex expert and advocate, revolutionizing the notion that sex has no expiration date. Today, the acclaimed 75-year-old author and Sebastopol resident is sharing her ageless sexuality message for seniors as she teams up with noted sex educator jessica drake in their upcoming film, “jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex: Senior Sex,” beginning production in April 2019.

Media members interested in attending the shoot in Los Angeles, or interviewing Price or drake, may email PR@GuideToWickedSex.com.

“I am thrilled to join with jessica, one of the leading sexual rights advocates, to share my message of sexual empowerment for seniors,” Price said. “Sex in our later years has its challenges, but sexual pleasure can be lifelong -- with the right education, an open mind, a spirit of adventure, and a sense of humor. My mission is to provide information to help seniors enjoy sexual pleasure through the decades ahead.”

The newest edition of “Guide to Wicked Sex” brings together Price with noted performer, director and sex expert jessica drake, as they take viewers into the world of sexually-zesty aging. They explain -- and performers illustrate -- how couples and singles can keep the fire going and the body responding lifelong. This collaboration between the two sexperts will offer insights and tips for better intimacy after age 50, 60, 70, and beyond.

“I’m so excited to begin work on this newest installment of our award-winning series and demonstrate that sex can get better with age,” drake said. “I’m grateful to share in this effort with the amazing Joan Price who brings her vast knowledge and experience on the topic of sex for seniors. We’re looking forward to changing some attitudes and debunking misconceptions with this exciting edition of 'Guide to Wicked Sex.' This may be my favorite guide in the series and it hasn’t even been shot yet.”

“Guide to Wicked Sex: Senior Sex” will feature explicit demonstrations along with sex scenes illustrating sex tips and techniques. The episode will feature people sharing their talents in a unique setting that is both instructional and compelling. The new edition of the series takes viewers through a variety of topics, from how aging affects our bodies and responsiveness, relationship communication, expanding what “great sex” can be, overcoming the obstacles, and staying sexual while solo.

Price’s journey as a senior sex advocate began 18 years ago after meeting artist Robert Rice. At age 61, she wrote “Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk About Sex After Sixty” (Seal Press, 2006) to celebrate the delights of older-life sexuality. She followed that with “Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud About Senior Sex” (Seal Press, 2011) and "The Ultimate Guide to Sex After 50" (Cleis Press, 2014) to address the problems and challenges of sex in an aging body.

Robert Rice passed away from cancer in 2008, seven years after they met and two years after they married. Joan Price continues her work to transform attitudes about senior sex. She is currently writing a new book on a topic that is sorely needed: “Sex After Grief: Navigating Your Sexuality After Loss of Your Beloved.” “I couldn’t have written this book ten years ago or even two years ago,” she says, “But now it’s time.” Price writes intimately about her own grief journey and includes other grievers’ experiences.

Before Price became a sex educator, she had two other professions. She was  a high school English teacher for 22 years, the last 12 at Petaluma High School. A few years after a 1979 near-fatal automobile accident Price became a fitness professional, teaching that “exercise should be a treat, not a treatment.” She wrote several books about health and fitness, including “The Anytime, Anywhere Exercise Book: 300+ Quickand Easy Exercises You Can Do Whenever You Want.” Now, she teaches popular contemporary line dancing classes in Sebastopol and Santa Rosa, California.

About Joan Price:
Joan Price calls herself an advocate for ageless sexuality. She has been called other things by the media: "senior sexpert," "the beautiful face of senior sex," and—her favorite—"wrinkly sex kitten." Joan has been writing and speaking about senior sex since 2005. Her books include:
  • Sex after Grief: Navigating Your Sexuality After Loss of Your Beloved, Joan’s newest book, coming August 2019.
  • The Ultimate Guide to Sex After 50: How to Maintain – or Regain! – a Spicy, Satisfying Sex Life, her most comprehensive senior sex book.
  • Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud About Senior Sex, winner of Outstanding Self-Help Book 2012 from the American Society of Journalists and Authors and 2012 Book Award from American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists.
  • Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk About Sex After Sixty, Joan’s spicy memoir celebrating the joys of older-age sexuality.
  • Ageless Erotica, a steamy senior sex anthology which Joan conceived and edited.
At age 75, Joan Price continues to talk out loud about senior sex -- partnered or solo – in speeches, workshops, and webinars, and on her zesty blog, Naked at Our Age, which includes senior sex news, views, and sex toy reviews from a senior perspective. She also writes the “Sex at Our Age” column for Senior Planet. Subscribe to her newsletter here and watch her entertaining, free webinar, “Safer Sex for Seniors”.

About jessica drake:
An exclusive Wicked Pictures performer, writer, and director, as well as a global humanitarian and emerging sexual wellness authority, jessica drake’s brilliant career is illuminated by her prodigious talent and adult industry clout. A recipient of three coveted AVN Best Actress awards and AVN’s Mainstream Star of the Year honor, jessica has solidified her status as one of the industry’s most illustrious stars. However, it is her time invested in healing, working alongside, and educating the public of which she is most proud. In her self-directed, written, and produced “jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex” series of instructional videos, jessica brings erotic topics to life through intimate demonstrations performed by some of today's top adult stars. Each edition addresses a different aspect of human sexuality, which is presented in the spirit of inclusion and explored with a distinct blend of knowledge, experience, and good humor. The series has earned recognition from AVN, XBIZ, and The Feminist Porn Awards, and is available on DVD, VOD and multiple streaming platforms.

A charismatic public speaker, the same demand for her modern sex education DVDs also takes jessica around the world - presenting seminars and workshops at expos, retail outlets, and colleges like USC, UCLA, and Chapman University – where she speaks to curious adults desiring to learn more about sex, romance, and communication. jessica also continues to be a paramount voice for sex workers across the world - she’s spoken at the Let Us Survive march, a rally for sex worker rights, and is a continuing sponsor of one of the first summits for sex workers, CatalystCon.

While jessica is certainly a performer at heart, her passion for sex education, advocacy, and inclusion are just as potent. “My passion comes from personal experience,” she states candidly, “from the idea we are all connected.”

For more information about jessica drake, visit Twitter.com/thejessicadrake.

About Guide to Wicked Sex:
Three-time AVN Best Actress winner and sexual wellness authority jessica drake brings erotic topics to life through intimate demonstrations performed by some of today’s hottest adult stars in her "Guide to Wicked Sex" series. The stimulating sequences are sensual, provocative and enlivened by an informative optional audio commentary. In each volume of “jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex,” writer, producer, director, and host jessica drake addresses a different aspect of human sexuality, ranging from Fellatio and Anal to Basic Positions and Female Masturbation. jessica explores each topic with the same distinct blend of knowledge, experience, and good humor, which led Dee Dennis, the founder of sexuality conference CatalystCon, to praise her as “an amazing sex educator and speaker, who represents a new direction and is breaking new ground” in the sexual self-help genre. The series’ volume on Fellatio earned AVN’s 2012 Best Educational Release trophy, “Anal” was named XBIZ’s 2012 Specialty Release of the Year, “Anal Sex for Men” received AVN’s 2014 Best Educational Release award, and “Plus Size” earned XBIZ’s 2015 Specialty Release of the Year. 



# # #

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PH: 818-349-3593

For Wicked Pictures international sales information, please contact:
Steven Vlottes
PH: 818-349-3593

For Wicked Pictures press information, please contact:
Daniel Metcalf
PH: 818-266-7910

For media requests or to interview jessica drake or Joan Price, please contact:
Ash
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PH: 503-866-6820


Saturday, March 09, 2019

Review of JETT from Hot Octopuss


Review of JETT from Hot Octopuss

by Shamus MacDuff 


“Gentlemen, start your engines!” begins the famous Indianapolis 500 automobile race. With the JETT, the wonderful new sex toy for penises from Hot Octopuss, you can start your own engine, and really rev it up.

JETT’s dual engines are vibrating silver bullets powered by four AA batteries. One “engine” contains a motor that produces treble vibrations, and the other yields deeper, more rumbly bass vibrations. What makes this innovation exciting is that you control the intensity of each motor. You can play with and set the levels of treble and bass intensity against five built-in vibration patterns to provide a wonderfully wide range of stimulation.

JETT has an expandable, circular silicone sleeve positioned directly above the dual jet engines into which you place your penis — flaccid or erect. The sleeve surrounds the frenulum on one side and the ridge atop the penile head on the other. When JETT revs up, the sensations are multiple and magnificent. The real fun with this toy comes (pun intended) in locating precisely the right treble and bass frequencies, paired with one of the five vibration patterns, that launches you into the JETT stream.

soft packer from Good Vibrations
When I used JETT for solo sex, I loved the way I could stretch out the glorious sensations by switching intensities and vibration patterns. I tried it starting with a flaccid penis (flaccid didn’t last long!), and next time with a semi-erect member. JETT’s “dual exhausts” quickly brought me to orgasm in both cases.

I thought JETT was solely for masturbation until my female partner asked to observe it in action. To my immense pleasure, she discovered that fellatio on the protruding tip of my penis sent me into an ecstatic state and rapid ejaculation. So there is a place for JETT in partner sex as well as solo.

dildo from Tantus
Twice when I tried to change from one vibration pattern to another, JETT simply stopped on me, and I had to restart it. Also, be aware that a battery-powered device is not waterproof. But these are minor inconveniences compared to the enormous positives that surround this delightful and fun new sex toy for penises. It is also priced affordably at just $69.

Learn more about the JETT here. Thank you, Hot Octopuss, for providing me with the JETT in return for an honest review.

Shamus MacDuff, age 75, was oblivious to the delights of sex toys for penises until about 1-3/4 years ago. He's been making up for lost time! Read his other posts here





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Wednesday, February 13, 2019

jessica drake and Joan Price Team Up for ‘Guide to Wicked Sex: Senior Sex’

4/22/19 update from Joan: Our film shoot was last week, and it was amazing! I'll write up a separate blog post describing the experience soon. The crew and cast were marvelous, especially our director, the extraordinary jessica drake. Experience of a lifetime! I'll keep you posted about release date and how to order. (The best way to make sure you don't miss out is to subscribe to my newsletter here.) 



FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE


jessica drake and Joan Price Team Up
For ‘Guide to Wicked Sex: Senior Sex’

Wicked Pictures is Casting for Nude and All-Sex Roles
vcsPRAsset_3540915_70370_3aee6b4a-ccda-4b6e-9ab9-4e81bcb6e4eb_0.jpg       Joan_Price__022_RT (1).jpeg

jessicalogo.jpg

LOS ANGELES - (February 13, 2019) - Adult superstar, sex educator and exclusive Wicked Pictures contract star jessica drake is teaming up with acclaimed author and expert on senior sex Joan Price for the newest installment of jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex: Senior Sex. The award-winning instructional series is now in pre-production and casting for several roles.

The newest edition of Guide to Wicked Sex aims to explore sexually active aging, and how couples and singles can keep the fire going and the body responding throughout the passage of time. This collaboration between the award-winning performer and activist and the noted expert on senior sex will offer insights and tips for better sex after age 50, 60, 70, and beyond.

Wicked Pictures is currently seeking people over 60 years of age who are interested in participating in this educational video with interviews, hardcore demonstrations, and possibly penetrative sex scenes. All applicants will be considered and the director is open to all entries. Previous on-camera experience is not necessary. To apply, please send photos and a short biography to GTWScasting@wickedpictures.com.

Drake recounts when the seeds for the project were first planted, “When I met Joan years ago, I realized immediately the impact she was making not only on seniors worldwide, but also the educational community. She has a gift of authenticity and relatability that few can match. I’ve wanted to collaborate with her for quite some time now to make an educational resource for older adults - generations that missed out on sex ed growing up and are now facing new challenges.” She continues with her current ideas, “My goals for this project are to ‘give permission’ to folks who may not believe they have it, to explore their sexualities and live out their fantasies, no matter their age or perceived physical limitations. I want to use my Guide to Wicked Sex series to empower as many people as possible, and I am grateful to Joan for her hard work and effort in creating this vision along with me.”

“Guide to Wicked Sex: Senior Sex” will take viewers through a variety of topics, from how aging affects our bodies and responsiveness, relationship communication, expanding what “great sex” can be, overcoming the obstacles, and staying sexual while solo. With expert advice and unique insights from drake and Price, this new installment of the acclaimed series will feature people in explicit demonstrations and sex scenes illustrating sex tips and techniques to enhance the sexual experience, partnered or solo.

Price comments, “I’ve long admired jessica drake for her sexual rights activism, her support of causes that touch her heart, and her dedication to sex education. Our Wicked Guide to Senior Sex is an outgrowth of all of these. jessica and I have been discussing and planning this project for a couple of years, and I’m thrilled that it will come to fruition in the next few months!” She explains, “Why a Wicked Guide to Senior Sex? You’d think that by age 50, 60, 70 and beyond, we’d know everything we need to know about sex. But no one warns us that our bodies and sexual responses will change as we age, often dramatically. Many seniors think that sex is over when they start experiencing sexual challenges, discomforts, and disappointments. But the truth is that sex can be exciting and satisfying again—with the right education, a spirit of adventure, and clear communication. I’m 75, and I’ve been writing and speaking about senior sex since 2005. This film will give a new dimension to older-adult sex education, with clear, practical advice demonstrated by real, sexy seniors.”

As a noted author of several books about senior sex, including “The Ultimate Guide to Sex After 50,” and self-described "advocate for ageless sexuality,” Joan Price is recognized for her active approach and support to restore or recreate satisfying sex for boomers, seniors, and elders.

Nominated Sexpert of the Year and Crossover Star of the Year at the 2019 XBIZ Awardsjessica drake is known for her best-selling adult movies and popular live appearances at men’s clubs. She is also a frequent contributor to a variety of media outlets as well as being highly sought-after sexual wellness speaker and educator who lectures at universities and leads seminars and workshops around the world. She is the writer, producer, and director of the video series jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex,” which has received critical acclaim from industry stalwarts AVN, XBIZ, Fleshbot.com, and others, as well as mainstream outlets like The Huffington Post, Cosmopolitan, Refinery29 and many others.

For more information about “jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex” titles, appearances, and sex education seminar series, visit GuideToWickedSex.com.

About Joan Price:
Joan Price calls herself an advocate for ageless sexuality. She has been called other things by the media: "senior sexpert," "the beautiful face of senior sex," and—her favorite—"wrinkly sex kitten." Joan has been writing and speaking about senior sex since 2005. Her books include:
  • Sex after Grief: Navigating Your Sexuality After Loss of Your Beloved, Joan’s newest book, coming August 2019.
  • The Ultimate Guide to Sex after Fifty: How to Maintain – or Regain! – a Spicy, Satisfying Sex Life, her most comprehensive senior sex book.
  • Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex, winner of Outstanding Self-Help Book 2012 from the American Society of Journalists and Authors and 2012 Book Award from American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists.
  • Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty, Joan’s spicy memoir celebrating the joys of older-age sexuality.
  • Ageless Erotica, a steamy senior sex anthology which Joan conceived and edited.
At age 75, Joan Price continues to talk out loud about senior sex -- partnered or solo – in speeches, workshops, and webinars, and on her zesty blog, Naked at Our Age, which includes senior sex news, views, and sex toy reviews from a senior perspective. She also writes the “Sex at Our Age” column for Senior Planet. Subscribe to her newsletter here and watch her entertaining, free webinar, “Safer Sex for Seniors”.

About jessica drake:
An exclusive Wicked Pictures performer, writer, and director, as well as a global humanitarian and emerging sexual wellness authority, jessica drake’s brilliant career is illuminated by her prodigious talent and adult industry clout. A recipient of three coveted AVN Best Actress awards and AVN’s Mainstream Star of the Year honor, jessica has solidified her status as one of the industry’s most illustrious stars. However, it is her time invested in healing, working alongside, and educating the public of which she is most proud. In her self-directed, written, and produced “jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex” series of instructional videos, jessica brings erotic topics to life through intimate demonstrations performed by some of today's top adult stars. Each edition addresses a different aspect of human sexuality, which is presented in the spirit of inclusion and explored with a distinct blend of knowledge, experience, and good humor. The series has earned recognition from AVN, XBIZ, and The Feminist Porn Awards, and is available on DVD, VOD and multiple streaming platforms.

A charismatic public speaker, the same demand for her modern sex education DVDs also takes jessica around the world - presenting seminars and workshops at expos, retail outlets, and colleges like USC, UCLA, and Chapman University – where she speaks to curious adults desiring to learn more about sex, romance, and communication. jessica also continues to be a paramount voice for sex workers across the world - she’s spoken at the Let Us Survive March, a rally for sex worker rights, and is a continuing sponsor of one of the first summits for sex workers, CatalystCon.

While jessica is certainly a performer at heart, her passion for sex education, advocacy, and inclusion are just as potent. “My passion comes from personal experience,” she states candidly, “from the idea we are all connected.”

For more information on jessica drake, visit Twitter.com/thejessicadrake.

About Guide to Wicked Sex:
Three-time AVN Best Actress winner and sexual wellness authority jessica drake brings erotic topics to life through intimate demonstrations performed by some of today’s hottest adult stars in her "Guide to Wicked Sex" series. The stimulating sequences are sensual, provocative and enlivened by an informative optional audio commentary. In each volume of “jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex,” writer, producer, director, and host jessica drake addresses a different aspect of human sexuality, ranging from Fellatio and Anal to Basic Positions and Female Masturbation. jessica explores each topic with the same distinct blend of knowledge, experience, and good humor, which led Dee Dennis, the founder of sexuality conference CatalystCon, to praise her as “an amazing sex educator and speaker, who represents a new direction and is breaking new ground” in the sexual self-help genre. The series’ volume on Fellatio earned AVN’s 2012 Best Educational Release trophy, “Anal” was named XBIZ’s 2012 Specialty Release of the Year, “Anal Sex for Men” received AVN’s 2014 Best Educational Release award, and “Plus Size” earned XBIZ’s 2015 Specialty Release of the Year. For more information, visit GuideToWickedSex.com, Facebook.com/GuideToWickedSex, Twitter.com/Guide2WickedSex.


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Saturday, February 02, 2019

Manta for Penises from Fun Factory


It's always a joy when Fun Factory comes out with a new vibrator, and this time, it's the Manta vibrating stroker for penises. I invited Shamus MacDuff to experiment with the Manta, and he sent this report:

MANTA from Fun Factory

 Reviewed by Shamus MacDuff 

 The latest addition to Fun Factory’s delightful menagerie is a new sex toy for penises called Manta. Manta joins other Fun Factory “animals” such as Patchy Paul (a caterpillar) and Volta (a squid) in their growing sex toy “zoo.”

Manta is so named because the “grippers”  of the vibrating stroker resemble the “horns” of a Manta Ray. These grippers (aka flexible wings) have six intensity levels and six different rhythms to create a range of exciting stimulation. Manta can be used successfully in solo sex or in partnered fun, and either way it’s a winner.

Solo, I especially enjoy moving it slowly up and down my penile shaft with lube before eventually concentrating its vibrations on the frenulum and the ridge at the back of the penile head. Kazoom! This activity reminds me of watching real life manta rays rubbing up against coral heads back in my scuba diving days, an action to which they returned over and over because it obviously felt good.

Photo by Sebastian Pena Lambarri on Unsplash

My female sex partner used Manta to great advantage on my shaft, bringing me to throes of ecstasy as she combined Manta stroking with her own hand and mouth, backing off, and then bringing me up again. Joyous fun, leaving my entire body tingling.

Given that this wonderful “boy toy” works well solo or partnered, it will make an especially apt Valentine’s gift as that day for lovers draws near. Manta provides a ray of joy (pun intended) for penis pleasure. It’s wonderful to find another sex toy focused on the penis to accompany the many that are designed for the clitoris, vulva, vagina, and anus.


Shamus MacDuff, age 75, was oblivious to the delights of sex toys for penises until about a year and a half ago. He's been making up for lost time! Read his other posts here.

Note from Shamus's sex partner: I really enjoy giving my partner vibrator-assisted pleasure (as he does with me). Neither arthritis nor position fatigue stops the action when a toy like the Manta intensifies the sensation!


Note from Joan: Many thanks to Fun Factory for sending me their sex toys in return for an honest review. Take a look at all their products -- you'll smile at the shapes and colors, and I'm sure you'll find one (or more) that's just right for you. And here's a discount code for you:

SPECIAL 10% DISCOUNT
My readers get 10% off all Fun Factory products with the code JOANPRICE. Go to Fun Factory using this link or any of the links in this post. Explore. Choose. Use the coupon code JOANPRICE at the bottom of your shopping cart, before clicking checkout. Fun Factory is so eager to introduce you to the pleasures of their products that you can continue to use this discount code on all future orders until 4/14/2020. (Please note that this coupon cannot be combined with other offers.)



Sunday, January 13, 2019

Sex After Grief: Do you want to share your experiences?




Sex is complicated enough when it’s easy — but when we’re in grief, it’s especially mysterious and confusing. How do we nurture ourselves as sexual beings when we’re grieving the death of a partner? Why does taking care of ourselves sexually even matter when we’d rather hide under the covers and wail? What do we do with those sexual feelings that arise despite our misery? How do we know when it’s time to open ourselves to a new sexual relationship, whether it’s a friend with benefits or a new love connection?

I am thrilled to tell you that I'm writing a new book: Sex after Grief: Navigating Your Sexuality After Loss of Your Beloved. I will draw on my own experiences as a widow since 2008. I’ll share my own raw grief journey, my sexual reawakening (and the many stumbles along the way), my attempts to dip my toes in the dating pool, and what I learned.

This book won’t just be about me, though. As I’ve done in all my books about senior sex, I’ll include excerpts from other people’s personal stories, which will help readers see that we who have grieved have much in common, yet also much that’s different. There’s no right or wrong method or timeline for bringing our sexuality back to into our lives, whether it’s with our own hands, a well-placed vibrator, a hook-up, a new companion, or any combination.  

This is where you come in. If you have experienced the grief of your partner's death, how did you get sexual again? What was the hardest thing about opening yourself to sex with a new partner? What lessons did you learn about sex and grief that you'd be willing to share with others? What worked for you? What didn't work? What did you learn along the way? 

Additionally, I could use your experiences and perspective in these areas:

2/19/19 update: I edited this list again, deleting those topics that I no longer need and adding a few new ones. If you'd like to share your personal experiences or tips, even just a couple of sentences, I'd love to hear from you. I'll use short excerpts from your sex-after-grief journeys along with my own, plus quotes from professionals. Choose one of these topics and email me with "Sex after Grief" as your subject header if you'd like to contribute. **DEADLINE 2/25/19!** 
  • Your first partnered sex after/during grief, what it meant to you then, what it means to you now
  • How did you know when you were ready for partnered sex with a new person?
  • Feelings of guilt/betrayal of deceased partner when you wanted sex or had sex with a new person
  • Sex after grief when you're in a non-traditional relationship style: poly, kink, etc. 
  • Adventuresome sex after partner's death
  • Getting sexual in stages
  • Advice  about sex and grief from your grief counselor/ therapist/ coach/ surrogate 
  • Dating while grieving
  • Your first time with a new partner -- how did it go?
  • Communicating with a new (or potential) sex partner about desires, boundaries, uncertainty, safer sex
  •  Solo sex during grief 
  • What happened next? How you moved forward. Reflections on how far you've come. 
  • Advice for newly bereaved
  • Unexpected joy with new sexual partner  
  • Cautionary tales, warnings while we're vulnerable
If you'd like to contribute your wisdom or your story, please email me at this link with the subject "Sex after Grief." **DEADLINE 2/25/19!** If you prefer, you may post your comment here instead of emailing -- just realize that by posting, you are giving me permission to use excerpts from your comment.

Whether you post or email, I won't divulge your name or identifying details in excerpts that I use. You'll be anonymous in the book. Exception: If you're a grief counselor, therapist, book author, grief support leader, sex educator, etc. who would like to be quoted with your name, specify that.

People of all genders, all sexual orientations, all relationship styles are invited to contribute. Notice that I haven't said that you need to be age 50+. Sex after Grief will be primarily, but not exclusively, for our 50 to 80+ age group. Whether you're older or younger than 50 and you struggled with death, bereavement, and regaining your sexuality, your story is welcome.

Thank you so much for getting involved and helping other people who share the journey we never wanted to take. I hope to hear from you.

Thank you to all of you who emailed me since I first posted this 11/25/2018. Thanks to you, this book will be filled with diverse experiences and perspectives.  

It's not too late to email me and be included in Sex after Grief: Navigating Your Sexuality After Loss of Your Beloved**DEADLINE 2/25/19!** 



Saturday, January 05, 2019

Notes from the Penile Colony: Guy Talk about Vibrators by Shamus MacDuff

Note from Joan: Shamus MacDuff is the pseudonym of a 75-year-old retired university professor and author. Other than his name, he promises that everything he says about himself is true. His first guest post, “Great Sex Without Penetration: A Man’s View,” attracted so many readers and such positive response that when he offers additional posts, I quickly agree.

In the locker room at my gym, I overheard a 40-something guy complain to his buddy that his girlfriend insisted on using “a damned vibrator” that, in his view, kept “getting in the way of real sex.” I was tempted to interrupt and share a different story. I assert that more guys need to learn about the joys of sex toys, especially vibrators.

While a few vibrators are targeted specifically to provide stimulus and response to penises, a great many more kinds of sex toys exist. Most of these are designed especially (but not exclusively!) for clitorises and vaginas. It’s time to examine what these toys have to offer to penis owners, and to help guys like the fellow at my gym break out of the “penile colony” and begin to enjoy the myriad pleasures of a variety of sex toys.

For starters, most women cannot orgasm through penetrative vaginal sex alone, requiring arousal and stimulation of the clitoris. Vibrators are designed to provide exactly that stimulation, and it’s little wonder that women find them so desirable. If your partner loves her vibrator, that does not mean she doesn’t also love your touch. Rather, it indicates that she’s found the perfect combination of a partner and a vibrator to bring her to orgasm. Guys are not in competition with vibrators—they are our accomplices in giving joy and pleasure to our partners, a fact that the fellow in my gym had yet to understand. But there’s much more to this than meets the eye (or the clitoris), so let’s explore further.

It happens that vibrators work wonderfully on our male parts, too. During partner sex (of whatever form it takes), encourage your partner to apply her vibrator to your frenulum, your perineum, your nipples, or any other “turn on” spots that give you a happy buzz. A happy buzz is just what vibrators provide, often in a variety of patterns and speeds. You are sure to find several that will bring you to ecstasy more quickly than you thought possible. Once you do, you’ll then be vying with your partner for who gets “first dibs” on using the vibrator of choice. The fun and games during your partnered sex will be greatly enhanced for you both!

My partner introduced me to several delightful vibrators, and now these toys have also become a great addition to my solo sex practice. While the ones designed specifically for penises are very effective, I have found that many others, produced originally with vulvas in mind, are hugely satisfying during masturbation. Playing with vibrators almost certainly will convince you that they are our friends—true orgasm enhancement tools for guys as well as gals.

That conversation I overheard at my gym saddens me, because the speaker was clearly a prisoner of “the penile colony”—a believer that the only real sex is penis-in-vagina (PIV), with an unfortunate primary focus on his own pleasure rather than on increasing hers. Vibrators offer fun and innovative ways to break out of that unhappy mental prison, allowing us guys to recognize and experience the full panoply of delights that sex toys can provide to penises as well as clitorises. Give ‘em a try—you won’t be disappointed!




[Read other posts by Shamus MacDuff here.]