Sunday, October 16, 2016

Older Women Wear Lingerie, age 72


Aging brings wisdom and experience -- and body image insecurity. Most of us, even if we glory in our sexuality, have misgivings about our ever-expanding wrinkles and sags. Sometimes it takes another pair of eyes -- whether a lover or a photographer -- to show us that our outer beauty matches our inner beauty.

At age 65, then again at age 68, I stripped to lingerie for photo shoots. I learned a lot about myself from these experiences and from viewing and sharing the results. People applauded, praised me for my courage, high-fived me for encouraging others to have their own lingerie shoots.

My  blog posts about these events quickly drew more viewers than any of my other posts, and they continue to place in the top four all time most popular posts. Many women shared their own experiences and photos, some privately. some publicly. I was happy that my experience had helped to empower others.

 I didn't know I would do it again. But in September 2016, I slipped (wrestled?) my 72-year-old body into lovely lingerie provided by Lovehoney.com and smiled at the renowned Los Angeles photographer, Perry Gallagher, who specializes in Boudoir, Fine Art Nude, Fashion, and Wedding photography.

How did this happen? Krista from Lovehoney knew Perry's work and mine. When she learned that I would be in LA for speaking events in September, she offered both the lingerie and the photo shoot.

Krista explained her involvement in the project this way:

Joan is a lovely timeless spirit and I was overjoyed to work with her on a photo shoot and check out some of Lovehoney's newest lingerie styles. I connected her with one of my favorite photographers, Perry Gallagher, to complete the vision. 

Joan is not only adorable, she is also breaking down stereotypes that women of a certain age are not considered sexy or sexual. I want people to see that lingerie isn’t just for the young and pert. Lingerie, and sex toys, can enhance your sex life and increase your self-confidence no matter your age, size, shape, or ability.

What was it like to work with Perry? A ton of fun. Perry is a true professional. He knew how to put me at ease with his humor and his appreciation of the female body whatever its shape, size, or age. He give me instructions -- where to turn, where to look, how to arrange various body parts -- including tucking myself back into my bra when breast spillage occurred. The whole time, he clicked away.



I felt completely comfortable with Perry -- except when I worried about him climbing on a ladder to shoot me from above. (I have a fear of heights -- he does not.) It was exciting to be at the center of his rapt attention, I admit that. Much of that excitement was the feeling, "I'm doing this. My 72-year-old body is fine with being photographed in skimpy bits of cloth." It was a truly empowering experience that I'll take with me anytime I fret about a new wrinkle or thigh puff.

Thank you, LoveHoney.com, for sending me the luscious undies and sponsoring this photo shoot. These are the products I'm modeling. Follow the links if you'd like to wear these yourself!
News flash: Lovehoney is offering my readers a 10% discount on everything -- not just lingerie! Follow this link.

Thank you, Perry Gallagher, for these amazing photos and for making the whole experience fun and full of laughter. View Perry's video here:




I would encourage other women of all ages to explore the opportunity to have just this type of experience for yourself: to be photographed and to see the inner beauty that is you, right now, no matter what age you are. Now is a good time.
-- Perry Gallagher

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Senior Sex Classes, no travel required -- Interested?


2/19/17 update: I just announced my first webinars:
  • "How the Heck Do I Date at This Age?" Sunday, March 5
  • "Ask Me, I'll Tell You: Talking Out Loud about Sex & Aging" Sat., March 18
 To receive info about these and future webinars, subscribe to my newsletter  here. Do it now so you don't miss anything! 

Let's talk sex by phone or computer! No, I'm not inviting you to have phone sex or webcam sex with me. I'm inviting you to hear a senior sex class and ask your questions -- via teleseminar or webinar.

Background: Many of you ask when I'll be in your area giving a speech or workshop. You want to learn my tips for sexy aging, or negotiate sex with a new partner, or spice up your long-time relationship, or figure out how to get back your desire for sex, or deal with online dating, for example.


I'm sorry, I get so many emails that I can't possibly answer every one. The answers are often in my books, but I know that many of you prefer a different way of learning, or you want more direct and personal answers to your questions. I do travel to give presentations in many cities (see my events schedule here), but I can't be everywhere.

If I'm not going to be in your area, would you be interested in attending a personalized class by phone or online?

That means you'd listen to my class on the phone or watch it on your computer and be able to ask questions and interact in a small group. You would pay a modest fee to attend, which would include a handout.

Here are some sample topics I'm considering offering:
·        Why don't I feel sexual desire and what can I do about it?
·        Great sex without erections – sex isn’t all about erections, what we and our partners need to understand about giving and receiving pleasure, no erection required.
·        Dating at my age – tips and insights for making it fun instead of scary and sad.
·        Online dating at my age – avoiding the mistakes that most people make.
·        Safer sex – why I need to care about this, tips for talking with a partner. 
·      Long-term relationships – how to spice it up again, recapturing desire and intimacy.
·        Non-monogamy/ polyamory/ friends with benefits – would this work for me?
·        Talking to my doctor about my sexual issues: when, why, how?
·        Solo sex is real sex – how to stay sexual without a partner.
·        Sex toys – do I need them? How do I choose?


Do some of these interest you? If so, here are some questions for you:

  1. Which topics would grab your interest? Examples above, or add your own. 
  2. Would you make time for an hour-long class, or would you prefer 30 or 45 minutes? 
  3. Would you prefer a teleseminar (via phone only, no computer required, audio only) or a webinar (via computer, audio and video -- you can see me speaking to you and view slides and images)?
  4. Would you be more likely to attend live, with the option of asking your questions, or listen to a recording on your own schedule?
  5. What country, state, time zone do you live in?

You can answer in the comments section here, or -- better -- email me so that I can contact you when I've finalized details. If you want to be on my mailing list for dates and topics, please email me with "online class" in the subject line. I look forward to hearing from you!


Update: Thank you for the emails I'm receiving! Clearly you're interested. If you've already emailed me, I'll be on touch. If not, please do! Let me know which topics interest you especially. Write to me here. Subject line: online class. -- Joan