Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Wading into the Senior Internet Dating Pool from Becka, senior online dating reporter

This guest blog is from Becka, the first reporter in my online dating posse to check in. Enjoy Becka's first report:

WADING INTO THE SENIOR INTERNET DATING POOL

Here you are, deciding to sign up on a senior internet dating site. These tips based on my experience should minimize the pain and maximize the delight.

1. Find the courage. I sat and thought about doing this for a year before I took the plunge. One of my best friends was my motivator. She died. I asked myself, “What am I waiting for?”

2. Ask yourself what you are looking for: a soulmate? a lover? a friend? Do you want face to face contact or just an internet pal?

3. Choose your site carefully. Some sites have more class than others. For example, eharmony.com has a lengthy questionnaire that is interesting and fun to fill out. SeniorFriendFinder.com has only the barest essentials. You can guess for yourself which one is most likely to end up being a dating hit-and-run experience.

3. Lie. It can't be helped. You fudge, you shave the truth, you fib. So does everyone else. Remember that! They ask you your body type. Will you select “Hot” or the all-purpose “Average”? You may think your body is hot, but, honey, have you forgotten or are just ignoring the hysterectomy scars, or the extra fat you carefully hide in your trousers, left over from a huge pride-producing weight loss? This is why you lie: there are too many things that are just too personal and intimate to put right out there on a website for the world to see. If you have no problem doing that, however, maybe you need boundary counseling. [note from Joan: I must need boundary counseling -- I always tell the truth!]

4. Pick the right name. Guys, please don't put “bo” after your name, as in Jackbo or Bobbo. If you are over 60 do not put “boy” in your name, as in boy556. That ship has long sailed. I did not respond to the inquiry from “boy123,” age 71 -- I figured his perspective was dangerously skewed. Women, watch out for the sneaky names, like “Rob069” or “ilktofku” (this actually got by the censors). Shun cutesy names like “cuteypie” or “cuddlecakes” -- do you really want to be defined by food? Pick a name that has some meaning for you, a name that you would feel proud of should the best person you've ever known read it.

5. Check your spelling! Otherwise you look stupid and you will get the responses you deserve.

NEXT POST: Becka signs up and gets matches -- sort of.

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